“Successful Love”: Byron Jamal’s Blueprint to a Healthy Relationship
“The rise of social platforms and busy work schedules makes us substitute healthy relationships with quick hookups and one-night stands. This means divorce rates keep rising ad singleness (and by extensions loneliness) are becoming the norm. That’s why you need a practical and inspiring guide to help you chart a new path towards a life filled with love and trust,” says motivational speaker and author of the book Successful Love, Byron Jamal.
Former pastor of 10 years turned love coach, Byron Jamal grew up as an adopted child in a deeply religious family. At a young age, he realized that he wanted to use his faith in very practical ways. So, he set out on a journey to help ordinary people find extraordinary love in their everyday lives. And he has successfully helped thousands of people learn how to give and receive the right type of healthy love.
After watching the trailer of his new book, I got the opportunity to speak with Byron, and really get to know the man whose life is dedicated to making sure people experience what true and healthy love is all about.
After watching the trailer, I can honestly say that I am extremely excited to read Successful Love. How did you go from being a pastor to deciding to leave the church and help people find real, true love?
Byron Jamal: To be honest, I attempted suicide. In that moment, I realized that even though I was deeply in church and even though I was probably at church more than I was at school and at home, I ended up still being in that negative head space. And that is when I realized that just being at church or that just being a Christian doesn’t help you with the feelings of loneliness and isolation. Soon after I began to realize that everyday people experience the same thoughts and go through the same situations. They go to church and then come home to find themselves still lonely, still depressed, and still anxious and overall burdened by different feelings that just won’t go away. After taking a long look at myself, I realized that it was time to leave the church as I couldn’t really be my true self due to the prejudices and religious rules that the church had. And now as a love coach I can help any and everybody find the type of love that they deserve.
Well how has your personal love journey been?
Byron Jamal: To be honest, my love journey has been the same as what most American love journeys have been like. Not always pretty, difficult, and struggles, but it has been one of discovery. I was discovering my affinity for both men and women at a young age, so as a bisexual man I was able to come to terms with who I was and what I liked. I also understand that there were many people like me who also went through this. I understood that love was much greater that just sexuality. But all of this helped me to figure out that I wanted to do was love and to be loved. And that is really the same goal of every human being that enters and leaves this earth. And right now, I am in a very happy, healthy relationship.
What do you feel are the 3 top issues that makes it difficult for both men and women to find and maintain healthy loving relationships and why?
Byron Jamal: The first one would be hurt or pain. People do not take time to heal before they enter into new relationships. Regardless of who you are, your financial background, or your ethnicity, one thing remains true, we are all born single. And It is during that time that we learn how to love and how to deal and grow from hurt. It is also during this time when we find ourselves and learn how to love ourselves. Healing from pain is that part of the process that many of us really don’t master. The second is the lack of self-love. Many of us are walking around looking for validation from other people. Then we get into relationships and they become more like a fix for an addict, making those people become more like drugs than the actual people we should be loving. Those people are what we need to feel important and loved. But the reality is that the other person is not supposed to be that. We are supposed to receive love and validation from them, but it should not because you are filling a need for that. The third would be faulty expectations. Think of this way, how can you get mad at something that you don’t have an expectation for. You must be willing to learn the other person enough to know what they will and won’t do and then build expectation off of that.
For all of the men and women seeking a successful type of love, what words can you offer to them to encourage them to never give up and never settle?
Byron Jamal: I want to remind them that love is all around them. Love is like air, the only way you will pass out is if you are holding your breath. Love is the same way. The only way you will not get it, is because you closed off your heart. By staying open, even though it hurts, you are vulnerable, and it is uncomfortable you, you will begin to see and feel the changes. You will allow yourself to attract the love you deserve and the love that you are worth. It is definitely uncomfortable but is worth the reward. So stay on the right path through this journey.
“Successful Love” is available at https://byronjamalshop.com/.
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