Grammy Award-Winning Singer Songwriter Monica Talks About Reflection, Forgiveness, Happiness & Being Intentional

Grammy Award-winning singer/songwriter Monica joined SiriusXM Urban View’s “The Mike Muse Show” to discuss her new series “Infamy; When Fame Turns Deadly” which premieres June 7 on VH1.

During the interview the star spoke with host Mike Muse about living in a hotel room for ten months after her divorce, and realizing the importance of “space and solace” for her and her kids once the pandemic hit:

“Once the pandemic hit, we really understood how important it was for us to be together. And for us to be able to, you know, you’re stuck inside, but who you’re stuck inside with determines how well it goes. I’m inside with people that I love, that I know love me, but when it comes to the outside, we wanted space..So we moved somewhere everyone could be satisfied..What I realized is I need peace and solace where I live. That’s important. That’s first. Because how do we do this type of job if we don’t have that?..So this house really has been a blessing because that’s a big transition from a two bedroom, and all of us in it. And we were bonding and having a good time and ordering room service and making the best of it, but in all truth, you want your space. You want them to be able to grow up,” Monica told Mike.

Monica spoke about reflection and forgiveness, touching on her recent post on Instagram when she was recovering from surgery in the hospital and the message she had hoped she sent her fans which was to ‘forgive your parents,’ further explaining why her song “Why I Love You So Much” was about her father:

“I was a reflective child. I’ll take you back to an interesting story just to give you an example of it. “Why I Love You So Much,” I’d never been in love with anybody. 13 recording records like that so I used my dad as a point of reference because I was not speaking to him at all at the time, per my choice, not his. And I looked at, I know I’ll always love him, but this is how I’m upset about what I feel he didn’t do when I was growing up or getting to this point..But as I grew older and became a parent and also interacting with other parents, I realized some of us aren’t equipped with the same things and some of what I expected of him, he wasn’t capable of. And so I allow him to love me the way he knows how and a part of what I was saying in the video when I was in the hospital, it came from, I’m not sure why that word was put on my spirit, but I have learned to be obedient in sharing. It came to me my fourth day, fifth day in the hospital. And I didn’t put it up then and I started not to at all, and it came to me again. I felt like that was confirmation. I don’t know who needed to hear that, but I hope that it helped someone because we cannot stay in the same places mentally and expect to grow physically, mentally, or any other way. When we’re holding on to things, we’re not able to grow..Every time we spread our wings to fly, whatever is holding us is pulling at our ankles. It prevents you from lifting yourself higher. So forgiveness is for you. It’s freeing for the mind, it’s freeing for the body, it’s freeing for the spirit. And be better, be better than what you had. That’s the goal. Breaking generational curses and not holding onto what wasn’t done, the way we felt like it needed to be. And that was what I hoped people would take away from it. And it seemed like some people really did, and I have to get back into sharing more like that. That’s something that I used to do and then I kind of stopped because people can find mess in a message real quick and that’ll turn you off. But I’m not going to let that stop me from what I feel like a part of my purpose is. A lot of what I’ve been through is to help other people through. I really do believe that so that was one of those moments.”

Monica also spoke about happiness, social media and being intentional:

Even when I’m striking a pose, I hope that I exude happiness because it’s something that I fight for. And when I’m not in that space, I don’t bring that to you. There’s enough negativity, there’s enough pain all throughout the world. If I’m quiet, I’m quiet with reason. If I’m not saying anything, if I’m not posting anything it’s with reason. Because I feel like when I bring myself to you, I bring my best self because just as you don’t know what I’m going through, I don’t know what you’re going through. So if you want to speak to spirits and hearts and minds, then you have to do it when yours is whole. So if I have an off moment, I’m not going to hop online during the off moment..I’m good with who I am. And that’s something that I had before the music business. I think that’s the key because the music business or the business as a whole, it will chop and screw everything you know about yourself if you’re not solid in it. So that’s what you see with a lot of people that start as young as I did, they have horror stories about what it took for them to grow up. A lot of what I experienced that was tough, were things I chose. It definitely wasn’t the music business. I knew who I was and who I wanted to be. I loved who I wanted to love with no apologies, I did what I felt was best for me with no apologies, and I was honest. That’s what keeps me connected…I think unfortunately, a lot of artists are made to feel that they have to act or pretend they’re perfect. And that’s the worst thing that could ever happen because there is no perfect person that walks this earth. It doesn’t exist. So they’re fighting and striving for something that doesn’t exist and they get kind of lost in it. So that’s why I love living in Atlanta. That’s why I love living with my family. That’s why I love doing the things that I do, and making songs like “U Should’ve Known Better”. Who else made a song about being in love with somebody in jail? Me.”

Content courtesy of SiriusXM Urban View’s The Mike Muse Show

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Dr. Jerry Doby Editor-in-Chief of The Hype Magazine, Media and SEO Consultant, Journalist, Ph.D. and retired combat vet. 2023 recipient of The President's Lifetime Achievement Award. Partner at THM Media Group. Member of the U.S. Department of Arts and Culture, the United States Press Agency and ForbesBLK.